Oh to be born with an inner sense of calm.
To feel at peace when all around is breaking down
When frustration gives way to rage,
The little calm I have takes flight to leave me
Acting like a kid instead of my real age,
And it takes a long while before I see
Any sign of that still centre deep within
And for the fiery furnace burning bright
With passionate zeal to let the healing balm
Of my inner calm, restore my equilibrium
And let me rest once more in serenity of spirit
Before the next crisis comes along and leaves me
Reeling on the floor and baying at the moon…
Please don't let another come along too soon.
I've only just recovered from this recent one
And need a brief respite to recover from shock
Of seeing my dignity fly out the window,
And my pride in my self control be undone
In an instant when nothing seems to be going right
And I stare in dismay at my world going from bright
To dismal grey, not a pretty sight when just before
I was standing on cloud nine, contented with my lot
When, once again, life takes an unexpected turn
And the fire within ignites to burn red hot.
It's not that I'm complaining about what I've got,
I just wish I could have a bit more time between
Each up and down period in my life, so that I could
Appreciate a little better how wonderful it's been
To feel tranquil and contented in a bubble of delight
Before its bursts and kicks me off my cloud
To land with a crash upon the earth and start that
Life long fight to overcome this latest trauma,
Fist flailing, tongue lashing and bawling aloud
I promise myself every time I land, this time
I'll deal with it calmly but, as usual, I fail, and fail.
And ever thus it was, and ever thus will be.
I'm just not meant to be a saint, so there…c'est la vie.